Among the myriad decisions you and your child will make when planning a bar / bat mitzvah, there is only one that has the potential to change your child’s life forever: the mitzvah project. A well chosen mitzvah project – one that takes your child’s passions into account – can ignite a life long love of philanthropy. The glitz, the glam, the fun, the dancing – all those things evaporate into thin air, ephemeral pleasures. But, the satisfaction that a child gains from actually making a difference in another person’s life can fuel an addiction to doing good.
I know first hand how intoxicating it can be to know that you’ve actually changed a life or maybe even saved a life. I am the Community Service chairperson for my kids’ school, and though that doesn’t sound particularly exciting, it kicks up the endorphins like an hour of cardio. Delivering hundreds of coats to warm the needy or blankets to warm homeless kittens makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something huge, even if the piles of laundry in my basement seem to multiply like some crazy sci-fi bacteria and my kids school papers threaten to overtake my kitchen table. Helping to save a life via my facebook rescue page for homeless dogs and cats? That's better than a slice of chocolate cake, a shoe shopping binge, a massage and mani pedi. Simply put, doing good just feels good.
So, how do you decide what mitzvah project would be a good match? It’s easy – just ask your child what he/she is interested in. Honestly, if you pay even the slightest bit of attention to your child, you probably already have a pretty strong inkling of what will be appealing. Is your child a first string athlete? How about collecting sporting goods for needy children in poverty stricken nations? Sports Gift, Inc. is an organization that "provides sports to underprivileged children throughout the world. " A future chef will surely find collecting food for a local food pantry or organization, such as Island Harvest, nourishment for the soul.
Is your child a budding Dr. Doolittle? Collecting blankets and towels, in addition to food, treats and toys for an animal shelter can be especially rewarding. I created a campaign for my kids’ school – Pennies for Puppies - and the children loved it. I collected towels; blankets; food; toys; treats; beds, plus the pennies component – spare change, which I used to buy even more of all of the above. I brought everything to our town animal shelter. Dropping off donations is a favorite activity for my animal loving bar mitzvah boy and this is likely the mitzvah project he will choose. There are many animal welfare organization desperately in need of funds. Island Dog rescues street dogs in Puerto Rico and delivers them to a new life (full disclosure – we have an amazing Island Dog, flown into Kennedy and delivered right to our door). It takes funds to accomplish this kind of life saving work and all donations to this organization go right to the rescues.
UNICEF is a great charity to collect change for, because all of their campaigns focus on helping children. Collecting gently worn shoes for Soles to Souls means the most destitute won’t have to go barefoot, in the poorest conditions – rubble in Haiti, floods in Tennessee. A bookworm will find collecting gently used books a particularly rewarding endeavor – helping a needy child discover the joy of reading ranks high on the satisfaction scale. These can be donated to a community center, a county social services department (the Nassau County Department of Social Services, where I bring the books collected during our school’s annual book drive, allows clients to choose and keep books from a large library, which constantly needs replenishing) or a school.
If you’d like a connection between the mitzvah project and Judaism or Israel, there are plenty of worthwhile causes sure to up the spirituality quotient or provide a link to Israel. These include The Lone Soldier Center in Israel, a haven for soldiers from other countries serving in the Israeli army; Hatzilu (support for poverty stricken and elderly Jews – including social services, food and financial support) and Mazon (feeding the hungry), both of which help Jewish families in need. Google “Jewish charities,” and 274,000 responses pop up, surely one will appeal to you and your child.
There are so many options for your child to engage in a truly meaningful mitzvah project, that this should be the most stress free element of planning. Best of all, it costs nothing (unlike the pricey photo favors and wallet busting centerpieces) and only adds a unique note to your celebration, while helping others. Plus, the lessons learned from a carefully chosen mitzvah project will provide a gust of spiritual wind upon which your child can ride into adulthood - the true meaning of becoming a bar / bat mitzvah.
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